Grandma Quigley

Grandma Quigley died on Thursday. She had been struggling with her health for a long time and Granddad passed away in 2000 so it's been hard for her to be alone. The family finally put her in a home about four years ago because she had dementia and needed more care. They found a wonderful home in Provo and she was happy there. In November of 2005 when I flew to the states for Kasen's birth, I was able to fly to Utah to visit Ariana in Provo. Ariana took me to the rest home to see Grandma. Grandma was having a difficult time that day and I am pretty sure she couldn't figure out who I was. But, it's funny how her personality was still the same. Her whole life she spent putting on nice functions or dinners for friends and family. She was always a gracious hostess and although her mind and body were not functioning properly, she kept that personality. We were sitting in the dining room with the other residents and Grandma kept commenting on how nice it was that we had such a good turnout for this dinner. I remember looking around and thinking that there weren't all that many people there and not only that, it was just the regular dinner for the fifteen or so people that lived in that wing of the nursing home. Grandma took us down the hallway to see her room and the shadow box that Ariana had made for her. When we came back, she stopped at the doorway of the dining room and got everyone's attention. She thanked them all for coming to the dinner and most of them politely and gratefully replied, "You're welcome." It was kind of funny.

At the end, she just decided to stop eating and drinking and was put on hospice. Her children were able to get there in time to say goodbye with the exception of Mom who is on a mission with Dad in the Dominican Republic. Wednesday night, her boys gave her a blessing and released her to death if that be her wish. Within about eight hours of the blessing, she was gone.

I know that Grandma is happy to be back with Granddad and to have her memories back. It's got to feel good to be released from a tired, worn out body. She was 92 and knows more people on the other side than here. She was always an incredible hostess and I imagine she is in her element with a big welcome party in her honor with her family and friends that have gone before. Mormon funerals are awesome because we understand that and when a good, long life is over, it's more of a celebration of that life and a family reunion for those left behind. I was having a little pity party for myself yesterday because I really wanted to be there. We were able to get Skype working and I was able to see some of the family for a few minutes but we didn't do it soon enough to realize they needed a newer version of skype in order to enable the video for more than one call. The audio was fine but if we wanted to do video, it could only do one. I decided it was more important for Mom to be able to see it from her mission in the Dominican than to have both of us be able to listen. The funeral director said he would put the service (audio) on the internet and we can hear it later. I am looking forward to that.

Anyway, yesterday wouldn't have been so bad but all kinds of ridiculous things happened that one at a time, would have been just challenging but instead, I wanted to go to bed and pretend I didn't have responsibilities and that my husband was home so I could have that luxury. (Christian is gone for two weeks and is currently in Kiev.) When I finally got the "fires" put out, the family that we've been babysitting for four days sent home and my kids in bed, I was able to call Mom. We talked for hours and it was good. Unfortunately, that put me to bed at 2 am and I am a morning person. I don't do well on three hours sleep. After I got Jesse driven to work this morning, I came home and crawled back in bed.

It's spring break and we are taking a little trip to Rust, Germany tomorrow. We are staying until Friday or Saturday. There is a theme park there called Europa Park and the kids are excited about this. I know I need to get ready to go but instead, I am writing for a few minutes.

I am so grateful for good friends, family and the gospel. I opened a Facebook account a few months ago which kind of seemed like a silly thing at first and maybe a waste of time, but I wanted to keep up with what my teenagers were doing and know who they were talking to, etc. I am finding that it is good for me too. I really have made some wonderful friends in my life and met the nicest people. The Facebook account has been a good way to stay connected. I posted that it was hard to be away from family during the time of Grandma's funeral. A lot of my friends reached out with little words of comfort. This helped me more than I want to admit and reminded me that I am never alone.